Alternatives In Recovery
Nancy DePaola Coaching

The rays of happiness, like those of light, are colorless when unbroken"
Harry W. Longfellow
Trauma, Grief
 and Family Addiction Coach
(804) 690-6332
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You Matter

You Are Important

You deserve:


A dysregulation of the midbrain, dopamine system, due to unmanaged stress,
resulting in symptoms of decreased functioning, specifically:

                                              1. Loss of Control
                                              2. Cravings
                                              3. Persistent drug use despite negative consequences

"Childhood Trauma Changes the Trajectory of How Our Brains Develop" 
-Dr. Kevin McCauley

   Many of us have experienced the frustration of dealing with a family member or close friend who suffers a substance use disorder. There is nothing more frightening or frustrating than the inability to help someone who is slowly killing themselves. 

   By the time we realize there is a problem, many of us find that we are exhausted, bitter, sad, indifferent and angry. We wake up one day to realize our lives and family dynamic have changed completely. We don’t realize until it's too late, it is we who have lost so much....and all the while our loved one continues to deteriorate before our very eyes. We have coped the only way we've known how, for so long. We realize now, we too, have become lost and confused. What happened to our lives? How do we pick up the pieces and return to something that resembles normal?  

​    Science tells us now,  factors like early childhood trauma, depression, PTSD and other mental health disorders, physically change the trajectory of how the brain functions. When that has happened, introducing a chemical into that brain system can cause someone to become dependent on a drug or alcohol to cope with how they deal with stress. The normally functioning brain system, is compromised.

   Although many take prescriptions drugs meant to treat depression, many do not deal with the underlying problem of the trauma or grief which caused it. Once dealt with appropriately, adaptive coping skills can be introduced into the process, and the mind can heal itself.

   A family member struggling to get their loved one off of drugs, can become frustrated, angry and suffer secondary trauma in the process. Just like trauma and grief, the partner has to pick up the slack, dealing with financial losses, child rearing, home and job responsibilities. The person trying to hold it all together, doesn't realize they are experiencing secondary trauma, themselves. Something has to change so the family can become healthy again.

    I would be honored to help you on your personal recovery journey.  I have experienced first hand what is like to have active addiction in my household.  As a family member, I have worked my own program of recovery and have practiced these principals in my own life for the last 14 years. Now, I am able to help my loved one in a more healthy manner, and I can keep from losing myself in the process.

    Let me help you in your recovery journey, so you can witness the miracles that I have witnessed in my own life with my family and relationships.

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